brain scan results are in

We learned the results of Pierce's brain scan today and it appears that the bleed has worsened. It is now a 3 on one side and a 4 on the other. The nurse practioner assured us that this really doesn't mean much. She said she'd seen babies have no lasting effects from bleeds and on the other hand, she'd seen babies with lesser bleeds have more significant issues. And really, there is no way they'll be able to know how much damage has been done until Pierce grows and they can measure his development.

I wish I could say that we are not disheartened tonight, that we were filled with the same level of joy that we have felt for the last 48 hours, but that would be a lie. Every minute of this past hour my heart has wrestled with thoughts of extreme disbelief. I just watched God perform a miracle (referring to the potassium levels that dropped) and yet for my sinful heart, that isn't enough. But I am so thankful that even in my sin of unbelief, God is gracious. He is still working. I am not thwarting his plan. And I do know that He is using this to draw out the sin of unbelief from within my heart. Pierce was a little more fiesty tonight so his fantastic nurse Laura has been on her toes trying to keep little man from getting riled up. As a mother, it is so hard to stand by and watch as others try to comfort your baby. But yet, it's as if God is saying to me "I am sovereign. I am holding him. He is in the best hands. Only I can bring him ultimate comfort." I am holding on to the hope of that tonight.

Pray for us as tonight as I am sure there will be more tears shed than last night. Pray for Pierce- that he will rest and be comfortable. Pray that tomorrow will be a good day. He is scheduled for another echo to examine the PDA (heart valve). The doctors will be assessing whether he is a candidate for the medicine or if surgery will be needed. Also pray for the brain bleeding. Unless Pierce shows signs of fluid build-up (he has no symptoms yet), they will wait to scan him until next Monday. Please pray that God protects his brain and that no significant damage will occur. We know that God is the one who has and will continue to knit him together and we trust that He is working mightily in Pierce's life. We trust that the faith we are demonstrating to the world will not put us to shame.



  1. Lindsay ...
    You, Nik and Pierce have so many people all over the US and probably even farther ... praying for you and this story has touched so many hearts. I refresh this blog every chance I get. I not only pray for Pierce but for you and Nik. Hang in there! Your will is more than amazing and your family will forever be in my heart! My own faith has changed and so has my husbands ... for the better! Keep trusting and believing ... I know you will!

    God bless the 3 of you!

    Amy, Dave & Ryan Nardelli

  2. I, like Amy am so inspired by you and your family. I continue to pray for you tonight, and will celebrate Pierce's one week birthday tomorrow at 7:42.

    Rest well. Your baby is in good hands.

    God Bless you all.

  3. Lindsay, Nik and Pierce..
    I have had you all in my prayers since I learned of the early delivery last week. I have been praying every day for God to touch baby Pierce and heal him fully. I continue to pray for him throughout each day and tears well up in my eyes when I read your posts. Thank you for being faithful servants of God and for not being afraid to speak out about your faith. You two are a rare breed!
    My prayers will continue for healing for your precious son. You are a family, and so many are witnessing this miracle unfolding before us and speaking to our hearts. Enjoy this time with your son and try to let go of the worry. Hand the worry over to God. He will take your burden. Our loving God can.. and will handle it, and allow you to let go and rest while He cares for His precious creation. He is fully aware of the outcome and it will always be the very best. It's so obvious our Lord is hearing all the prayers lifted up for Pierce. He has been showing us how powerful He is and how much love He has for all of us throughout this past week. He hears our plea for Pierce to be healed and it touches so many. I pray they will allow you to hold him again soon so he will feel the nurturing love from your touch. My prayers will continue and I fully believe our Lord can heal your precious baby.
    BTW.. this is your mom's friend from OLC..
    Much love to you all,

  4. I know I've posted before, but I just wanted to put it out there again that if you have any questions at all - please email me at jessi.bennion@gmail.com. Our son was born at 23 weeks, suffered a grade 3/4 bleed, has 2 shunts, had PDA surgery... pretty much everything a micropreemie goes through. I know it is so overwhelming with new information all the time. We blogged through our whole journey. The amazing thing I want to tell you is that the brain has the ability to re-wire itself. Even if the bleeds result in hydrocelphalus, the brain can heal itself. Anyway, I am so sorry. I know it hurts so bad. I am praying for you. I hope you can get some rest.

  5. 'Amen' to the truth of us having a Father who is not thwarted by our unbelief, but rather loves us and blesses us because of the faithfulness of His Son. Rejoicing with you in our freedom to struggle, and praying for your sweet son. A sister in Christ in Athens...

  6. I am so inspired by your story. A Facebook friend posts your blog updates daily. I do not know you personally, but you have a sister in Christ in SC praying for you. My teenage boys ask for Pierce updates and are also praying for you. Your strong faith is such a testimony.

  7. Marilyn, Elaina & Blake, Melanie, Ashton & BrandonApril 19, 2011 at 9:41 AM

    May God's peace and rest hold and comfort you during this roller coaster of events. The Great Physician is sovereign over all!

    Our thoughts and prayers are continually with you.

  8. Dear Nik and Lindsey, I saw this blog through a family member and I know through personal first hand experience and professional experience, for I have been a NICU nurse for 35 years, exactly what you are going through. I am a born again believer and believe it no accident to have seen this site. There is a song written by Ron Hamilton called ,"Rejoice In The Lord" that I think would encourage you. God makes NO mistakes. Take one minute at a time and Gods grace will be sufficient. Yes, by one man sin entered into the world, but please don't beat yourself up thinking you are going through this for something you've done. Lazarus was raised from the dead in John 11 for the glory of God; Second Corinthians 1:3-4- God comforts us in all our tribulations so we can comfort others whose path we cross. We have a group of ladies from a local church who make very colorful linens, snuggli's etc. as a ministry for our babies. I would love to send you some if they agree. Please let me know @ save_a_turtle@yahoo.com. Oh we just sent home after some months a 22 weeker in very good condition. Praying for you in Christ.

  9. Your story is very close to my heart, as I just had my son at 24 and 6. We just brought him home in January after going through 5 surgeries, multiple infections, and close calls. Remember God is good All the time, draw your strength from him. Make sure that you are accepting help from others because this going to be a long physically and emotionally exhausting road. Please know that I will be keeping you and your family, especially your little one in prayer, and gather up an army of believers here to pray for you as well.

  10. This has really touched my heart this morning. I lift up little baby Pierce to the Lord this day & hour. Asking that His Mighty Hand would protect his tiny brain, and his tiny body. As we know, God knows all things and can do all things. I just pray that He will give you & your husband some peace during this time. As this is must so so difficult. I will continue to pray for Baby Pierce and to follow the miracles that God continues to do in his life and in yours. God Bless....Raelene

  11. yeah nice post great on brain mri. I like it. find more mri scans and their cost on